Cooking...How I Dread Thee.

-By Amy

So, here's the deal.  I stink at cooking.  When I try to cook, I end up scraping burnt toast, spilling frozen peas all over the floor (happened last week), undercooking or overcooking meat, and digging egg shells out of batter.  When I make brownies, there's like 6 gouges in the top from me checking it complusively, scared that I'll overcook them.  When I'm cooking chicken in a pan, I cut open like every piece to know if it's done, letting out the juices and causing my best-known recipe: "Chicken Jerky".

My dislike for cooking started young.  My mom tried to get me to take my turn every week cooking dinner, and even tried to teach me...but, I was a brat and resisted any effort on her part to teach me any "homemaking" skills.  Whenever it was my turn, I made spaghetti.  My mom wisely chose her battles and let me cook my spaghetti.  In college, I realized that cooking caused me to spend 30 minutes making something that I wolfed down in 3.  UGH!  Also, the dishes left over after a nice meal made me want to just go chuck all my pots and pans in my apartment complex's dumpster.  Consequently, I ate a lot of sandwiches, spaghetti, and microwaved quesadillas.  (On paper plates of course.) 

I felt fancy when I made this: chicken salad sandwiches with fruit salad and a cheese stick...I'm so gourmet! :)

My husband, on the other hand, likes to cook.  He worked in restaurants for years, and is experienced enough that he can just throw in ingredients without measuring.  He can improvise and substitute ingredients, and his food always turns out!  Mingling flavors and using subtle spices make his little cooking heart glow.  (I'm like, "There's such thing as WHITE pepper?  And...what the crap is paprika?"  My palette is not so sophisticated.  Don't get me wrong, I love good food, but also love to dump salsa or barbeque sauce on everything, which makes my poor husband cringe.

I admire his skill, and I've always been happy to let him cook.  I mean, it's not like I lounge on the couch, eating bon-bons and watching soaps while my husband slaves away over a hot stove--no, we've always cooked together.  Well, mostly I just follow his directions: "Measure this, chop this, stir this," etc.  Which I like.  Nowadays, I'm usually feeding Hayden his dinner at his high chair and occasionally chopping this and that.  So, my husband continues to cook most nights.  And I continue to be a a lame-o non-cooking human.

Here's the deal, though.  Some days he can't cook.  He gets home from classes too late, or he's got other stuff going on.  And in the future, when he's done with school, he will have a grown-up job where you don't get home at 4 everyday--more like 6.  I will need to make dinner, or at least start dinner everyday if our kids are going to have food before bedtime!

"Amy, you pansy, what's the big deal?"...you may ask.  "It's just food!"

Well, undercooked chicken can kill my whole family.  How's that for pressure?  And, it's intimidating to cook for a foodie, like my husband.  I mean, he's never rude when I cook and he always thanks me, I just know how much he loves good food and the care he puts into cooking, so I get nervous that my food will taste lame and flavorless.  Plus, there's so much to keep track of when cooking--all the ingredients, the temps, the times, and that's just for one dish!  If you have a main dish and two sides... I'm toast.  Man, the timing kills me!  Starting everything at the right time for all the food to be warm and ready to go at dinner time?  Yikes.  When I cook, we usually have dinner after 7:30, cause I don't even think about it till 6, then it takes me 30 minutes to agonize over what to make, then an hour of chaos and crying, (my son usually, but occasionally me...ha).  Plus, I get confused...like when a recipe says, "Saute in oil."  I'm like, "Ok, I know what saute means, but what kind of oil?  Vegetable oil?  Canola oil?  Olive oil?  WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST TELL ME WHAT KIND OF OIL!?"  Or, "Salt and pepper to taste."  And I'm pulling my hair out thinking, "SO--I'm supposed to just pop some of this raw meat into my mouth to see if I put enough salt in it?" 

When I'm trying to cook, things just go wrong.  While I'm checking the noodles, the garlic bread broils to a crisp.  Or I totally forget to start the rice before making the sweet and sour sauce, and then we're waiting 20 minutes after the sauce is done for any rice to put it on.  Whenever I cook, my A.D.D mind starts freaking out, and next thing I know I'm burning food, forgetting ingredients, mis-counting the teaspoons... then throwing my hands up and pulling out a frozen pizza instead. 

Grilled cheese sandwhiches.  I had to take a picture, because I actually managed to burn not one, but BOTH SIDES!  OY.

You know what?  Enough is enough.  I need to push myself to cook.  I don't want to forever be anxious about cooking.  I don't want my kids embarassed when they have a friend over for dinner.  The time has come.

My goal is to make 4 meals next week.  And two of those four need to be something new I've never made before.  (Baby steps!)

Will you please help me? 

What meal(s) does your family love that are pretty easy, don't take too long, and are relatively healthy?  I'm trying to stay away from "cheesy peperoni tater-tots covered in sour cream, bacon, swimming in butter" kind of stuff.  As yummy as that sounds, I don't have the metabolism I used to have, people! 

Recipe ideas, advice, tips--I want it all!  Thank you in advance.  My son and future children depend on you!  And, please tell me I'm not alone.  Do you struggle with cooking?  Or did you before, then learned to love it?  I'd love to hear.  :) 
-Amy

Ps. I'm counting on you guys too hold me accountable!  Hopefully knowing that you all know my goal might keep me from pulling out the Freshetta!

Pss.  I'm sure you have other momma friends who are amazing in the kitchen.  Please SHARE this post with them so they can share their wisdom and advice!  I'd SO appreciate it.

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